Staff Articles
Brian Kaylor serves as
Communications Specialist for the
Baptist General Convention of
Missouri and has worked for the BGCM
since May of 2003. He is currently a
doctoral student in Communication at
the University of Missouri, where he
also teaches undergraduate
communication courses.
Kaylor has a B.A. in Communication
and Christian Ministry from Southwest
Baptist University and an M.A. in
Communication from the University of
Missouri. He also completed one year
towards an M.Div. at Midwestern
Theological Seminary. He previously
served as pastor of Union Mound Baptist
Church and worked for Mountain Country
Ministries of Tri-County Baptist
Association. He and his wife, Jennifer,
were married in June of 2004. Kaylor has
won several awards for editorial and
academic writing, including some from
the Baptist Communicators Association
and the National Communication
Association.
Send an email to Brian Kaylor: bkaylor@baptistgcm.org
Verb - Thursday, January 07, 2010
For each of the past thirty-five years, individuals at Lake Superior State University have published their list of words they believe should be banned. These are words they believe are misused, overused, or generally useless and unnecessary. Often they take on words describing new trends or technological advances, thus making the creators of the list seem a little like the cranky old man yelling at kids to get off his lawn.
The newly released list of words they hope will not be used in 2010 as much as in 2009 include: shovel-ready, czar, tweet, app, sexting, teachable moment, stimulus, toxic assets, too big to fail, and bromance. Also on this list is the use of the word "friend" as a verb. As was explained in the announcement of the list, this usage of the word "[c]ame into popularity through networking websites. You add someone to your network by 'friending' them, or remove them by 'unfriending' them." Apparently these word "czars" want to use this list as a "teachable moment" to remind us to use the word "befriend" instead of "friend" when looking for a verb.
It does seem that the use of the word "friend" is odd in the world of Facebook and MySpace. Most of us have lots more "friends" online than we would ever admit to in other contexts. Do I accept the friend request from someone I had two classes with in high school and have not spoken to since? Probably, but I'm not sure that means they are my friend. Do I accept the friend request from my mother or my in-laws? Yes, but I'm not sure I want them to hang out on my wall with all my "friends" I barely know. All of this means that when I log into Facebook I often feel like I'm stalking people who are basically strangers.
Therefore, if the list of words to banish included the stretching of the word "friend" to include people we barely know, then I might have agreed with the complaint. However, the idea of using the word "friend" as a verb is a good reminder that being a friend is more than just a status. It takes active involvement. Without the actions, people drift apart. Although neither will necessarily "unfriend" the other online, the relationship will not be what it once was.
Similarly, it seems that other nouns we use to describe ourselves should also be considered to be verbs. The word "Christian" should not just describe who we are but what we do as well. For now, the use of "Christian" as a verb does not quite sound right. "I'm going to Christian you" almost sounds like a threat! Yet, it might work over time if we all used it as a positive verb. Other words we use like "follower" or "disciple" already work as verbs and thus emphasize the need for deeds to match our words. Or perhaps the best word to use would be "neighbor," which can be a noun or a verb. The word grumps at Lake Superior might complain that we should not treat the noun form of "neighbor" like a verb, but it seems there is a deep theological insight to using the word "neighbor" as verb. After all, one of the most repeated teachings in the Bible is to "love your neighbors as yourself."
